About Us

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I was struggling with training and speaking engagements getting canceled right and left.  I knew many were impacted by COVID-19 so it wasn't just me.

I plunged into learning how to take my business on-line during the early days of the Pandemic.

Then, I had an epiphany that brought everything together.

I had been struggling for years to truly identify my target market.  Since I grew up in a family-owned business, I focused on business.  Oh, yeah, I had a license in Marriage Family Therapy but my true love was supporting people in the workplace.

Then I got trained in mediation and found my true love.  So many of the skills I gained through my training in psychology facilitated insight and awareness of people's pain in ways that served the mediation process well.

I went on to become President of a state-wide association, Director of Training for an international mediation training company, a Mentor Mediator for the Department of Navy and Federal Executive Board, and Co-Chair of the Workplace Section for the Association for Conflict Resolution.  Oh, I forgot about being President of ADR-San Diego.

But I was still struggling in bringing my worlds together...family - business - professional development - communication and conflict resolutions strategies.  Was there really one home for me?

Time home with a sudden drop in business allowed time for reflection, regrouping, and redirection.

Being challenged with some of the homework assigned in my on-line courses and the directions they were asking me to think, I reached out to talk to others.

It hit me (like a light bulb going on)...most of my conversations and connections were with lawyers.  And, I realized that I attended more conferences in the last 3-4 years in the legal-mediator arena than in my own field.

And, I found a growing attraction among my colleagues to some of the strategies and concepts presented during my speaking engagements.  

Was there something I learned along the way that was being taught in mediation training in the legal field?

What had happened?  Further reflection opened the door to understanding.

After my divorce 16 years ago, I didn’t trust or like many people in the legal field…okay, I gotta admit…I’ve been married twice and each of them were attorneys…brilliant minds...and, quite frankly, I found the problem-solving mindset sexy.

But even as I healed from the second divorce (one I never expected), I found the legal mindset  challenging...not in a good way.

I often wondered what really caused our marriage to fall apart and why I bristled whenever I encountered an aggressive litigator in deposition or from the witness 

stand.

Was I still holding on to a lot of emotion or what was that really about?

That's part of my epiphany!

While married, I advanced my career as a mediator and learned some incredible communication skills and strategies that I never learned in graduate school.

I went on to train professionals nationwide to become mediators, many of whom were attorneys. Some could make the shift while others were just not built that way...the advocacy role was fixed in 

their mindset.

That's what happened in my marriage. 

While I was rapidly gaining skills for more agile conversations and dealing with clients with intense emotions, he remained in his litigator mindset focusing on fixed facts (not possibilities), using his courtroom style of questioning at home as well as work.

His reputation was suffering and he was unhappy.

I felt I was on the witness stand every night even when no judge or jury were present. 

It wasn’t wrong (there's a time and place).  It no longer meshed and we had grown worlds apart in how we looked at things.  We were unable to find the middle ground on which we could co-exist.

Going back for my doctorate in 2012 opened the world of neuroscience, the influence of emotional intelligence, and a whole new way of looking at human behavior.  (A field of study not available during my Master's Degree).

As I advanced my newfound knowledge of Emotional Intelligence to the art and practice of mediation, my world opened to some incredible professionals who made the transition from litigator to mediator 

and shared my enthusiasm for tools to shift the mindset of clients entrenched in conflict. 

I was invited more and more to legal conferences as a Speaker on the “psychology of conflict” to augment the Lawyer perspective.

I soon realized I had a toolbox of skills from the business world of mediation that seemed to be missing from the world of lawyering. It's not only about shifting the mindset of our clients…it's shifting the mindset of the legal professional to include and emotionally-agile mindset and

fluidity to look at possibilities beyond the facts.  

Remember, there's human emotion involved.  When we don't have the courage, curiosity and confidence to navigate those murky waters of emotion, settlement can remain elusive.

This new series has been developed in consultation with many lawyers, both litigators and mediators.

It represents an opportunity to grow your skills for a whole new world ahead and in ways that will make you shine...and live a happier life...I guarantee it!

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